How does it make sense for me to think I could possibly be a transgender with such masculine traits and interests?
Well, I can change the oil on my truck, have completely stripped a bathroom to studs and rebuilt it from scratch, laid wooden floors on an entire level of our home, rooted for football, baseball, and hockey teams, ran the grill at cookouts, grew a full beard, never wore makeup or nail polish (actively avoided them), served as best man at a friend’s wedding, and never let my scalp hair grow more than 2 inches long. And here I am, a transgender woman.
I carefully cultivated masculine traits and interests to prove my masculinity and thereby disprove that I had any femininity. I was afraid of exposing any femininity because that might show that I was actually having feelings that I was supposed to have been a woman. I was ashamed and I felt broken. But why did I feel that way? Because I was taught that a penis was what defined a man, and that it was somehow less-worthy to be a woman. That’s a total crock of bullshit. Being a woman is just as worthy as being a man, and our society would be better off if we took the emphasis off of genitals and placed it instead on our moral fiber and actions to be good people.
I wasn’t a bad “man”, but I’m a much better woman. Because I am, at my core, a woman. I just happen to be one who can do some stereotypically masculine things.